The Ugly Truth of Divorce

Dear Little Black Girl,

Don’t stop climbing that mountain of adversity or discard those dreams that seem too immense. Stop shrinking yourself to fit into places you’ve outgrown, blossom and flourish at all cost.

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Why have you dimmed your light and stagnated the beauty of the flower inside you? I’ve found myself asking this question more often than not. I’ve lost myself in the worries of the world only to realize that I wasn’t being true to myself. I’m more than what the world sees and plants seeds into. I kept trying to throw the soil of others onto my flower, and would get upset when I wouldn’t grow. The nerve of me, right? Not everyone can understand how a flower blooms in adversity or darkness…I realized it wasn’t my job to prove to them why either. I've been hurt by people I would give the world to. As some of you may or may not know, I'm currently in the process of divorce. I questioned why did things happen like they did? Or what could I fix about myself to make the situation better? What did she have that I didn't? Then the answer came to me, and it was simply "nothing." Nothing I could have predicted would change the outcome, nothing I fixed with myself would show that I was a true gem, and she didn't have anything that I didn't have. In fact, I was better. The biggest thing I realized was that my purpose and my light is what causes people to fade away. But why should I turn off my light, when God put me here to illuminate the world. My light is here to spark someone else’s…

I’m worth everything you think I DON’T deserve, and that’s exactly why I’ll achieve it. I won’t ever feed into the perception the world has of me. The downfall of perception is that we can only view from the angle we’ve been exposed to. I’ve learned that one’s perception of me is reflection of them, and my reaction to them is an awareness of me. I’m focused on SELF, and I don’t expect the world to understand SELF. I’m not for everybody and I’m pleased with that! I’m fine with losing the world if it means finding myself. We’re all created for a purpose and made in God’s image. Your purpose will cause you to lose friends, family, jobs, material possessions, and the person you THOUGHT you were. Your timeline on life will not be the same, my key won’t open your door. Just don’t dim your light, don’t stop blossoming, and don’t stop dreaming. You’re more than what the world sees, they don’t see your heart. Your crown was made for you! Your throne was made for you! The world needs your light to shine in places were darkness persists. Your frequency, your light, and your purpose are more than chapters in a book. I honor the woman within in you that wants to blossom, she’s perfect. She deserves happiness, love, and most importantly peace. Spread your inner black girl magic around like confetti, and if the world isn’t ready for your confetti, glitter, or magic…then fuck ‘em.

I have glitter in my veins, God in my heart, and the world will feel my reign.

Namaste.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. You’re playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”- M. Williams