The Trials and Triumphs of My 20 Somethings

As I end the decade of my twenties, I find myself in awe of just how wonderful I am. I was made and created to bring light into this world. I am powerful beyond measure and this is just the start. My twenties broke me into shambles and then aligned me with the things I needed. I had spent so much time trying to make my life so perfect. When all I truly needed to be happy was myself. Now, that I’ve found her, I’m not letting her get away.

I’ve experienced heartbreak, losses, and things that I never wanted to lose. Yet, with each of those things came a better version of me. I gave so much of myself away during my twenties to the wrong people, places, and things. I gave so freely of my time, my sanity, and maybe even my body. I played it safe and stayed in the box that was never meant for me. The plan for my life was always bigger and it took me finding myself to see that. I allowed people to come in and determine my self-worth, because I didn’t see the value in being me. I spent most of my twenties in disdain of who I was and on temporary feelings. I allowed so much of myself to be dictated by people, society, and even my own warped version of self-worth. However, I’m not allowing the last years of my twenties set the course for the next decade.

I’m choosing to celebrate myself and reclaim all that I gave so freely to others. I call all my love and power back, because some of you NEVER deserved it. You were never enough for what God has in store for me. I deserve the life that I’m living and that I aspire to create—PERIOD. I won’t make myself shrink to make anyone feel comfortable—what you see is what you get. I know who I am now and I can’t allow anyone to make me feel like that’s not enough. There will be no more giving of my time, energy, mind, or my body without an even exchange. I must be equally yoked in all aspects of my life moving forward. I don’t deserve half of anything or anyone—I deserve it ALL. I deserve a love that makes me happy and I won’t settle due to the insecurity of others. Everything that comes to me in this season is my divine right to have. I will not feel guilty for the calling on my life or walking in my truth anymore. We spend too much time concerned about opinions in our twenties when the truth is, we should only be concerned about ourself. We have the right to be selfish and to live life on our terms. Part of me wish I would have found that out sooner. Then, other days I realize I found out at just the right time. So year 29 is more than just a celebration, it’s me setting the record straight. Not for people, not to change anyone’s perception, but to walk into what God has for me unapologetically. I won’t be distracted in this season by things that aren’t aligned with my will. The version of me that you created in your mind is in invalid. Its time to cut out the talk, and focus on the execution. Its time for me to emerge.

NeciaJ🌻💕

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