A Seat at My Table

Thanks for taking the time to read my blog. It’s appreciated it! The purpose of this blog is to express my feelings and my outlook on life. This is more than a blog, it’s my journey on how I conquer my spiritual strongholds. I named this blog Black Girl Magic Unscripted with the idea of breaking barriers and stereotypes. Black Girl Magic is about how we as strong black women cope when the lights go off and we exit center stage. This is for the black woman or girl that must push through adversity. This blog is for the black woman that little is given, but much is still required of her.

I’m more than my accolades and accomplishments on the wall. I’ve experienced many of the same feelings, moments, and disappointments you’ve faced. I know what it feels like to love someone with your entire being, only to discover your love was never enough. I know the heart sinking feeling of being told no, when you deserve that opportunity. I also realize the moment you discover that your purpose is bigger than yourself is the moment growth becomes inevitable.

Many of you are under the impression that I’m stuck on myself or I’m “bougie”. Honestly, I’m just socially selective. However, this is me opening up about being the strong best friend. You know the one...every circle or clique has one. She has all the titles, opportunities, and usually maintains in every situation. Well, I’m that friend. However, I’m here to say that even the “strong” best friend needs someone in her corner. She gets tired, she experiences failure, has doubts...sometimes she’s the one that needs uplifting. I never knew how much clout that saying held until reality hit all at once. I face many of the same problems others face. My college education doesn’t exclude me from being broken, hurt, or used by others. I’ve had many experiences that shaped me into the person I’m becoming. It doesn’t ease the fear of failure that creeps in my mind, or the fear that I won’t find genuine love. I like to consider myself a constantly changing puzzle, fixing pieces until they all fit perfectly. My life isn’t perfect, I just make it look easy. So this is my open letter to the story of my life, and here’s me letting you in on Chapter Vingt-Six. I am magic. I won’t ever apologize for the fire in me.

Namaste.

Necia Janay