I went to a spiritual counselor who told me that I needed to come out of hiding. I am a hermit, I am a loner, I am very much an introvert. In the words of Moneybagg Yo, “I don't like n****s, I don’t like b*****s, I don’t like nobody!” To be transparent, I really do not like people. People are so peopley. I understand we all have personal struggles but you have to know how to exert your energy in the public.
I am emotionally sensitive, thanks Cancer Rising, but be clear “Mama aint raise no hoe” -2Chainz. There are many days where I fight myself because I do not want to backslide into the person I used to be. I choose EVERYDAY not to cuss or hit others. Violence does not serve me and I don’t have bail money handy.
In coming out of hermit, you have to be protected in all aspects because so many people prey on the innocence of hermits. Hermits represent enlightenment, self-reflection, and solitude. As a current hearing loss advocate, I see why the counselor suggested for me to go outside, so that I learn how to readjust to people, but when are people going to adjust to themselves?
I battle myself everyday to remember small tasks, one wrong communication bomb, and its a wrap. I get frustrated because I have relearn how to use senses that used to be present. I am relearning my wholebeing, the last thing I need is to have unsettled or unbalanced around me. Bad energy truly messes with my spirit. The main reason is because I have done so much INNERwork that there is nothing that anyone can tell me about that I don’t already know.
I own my demons(thoughts) and I deal with them everyday accordingly. But one thing about it, I repent wholeheartedly. I refuse to knowingly be toxic. I try to be the light for everyone but when you try to dim my shit, I will turn on the high beams. I can NOT and WILL be forced to go back to those old habits of second guessing, doubt, overthinking.
I am protected in so many ways and I am thankful for them all. I make sure I keep some type of lucky charm on me for alignment and do my chakra cleanses regularly. Make sure you guarded and protected in whatever you practice, outside’s energy be OFF.